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He wants a threesome... I am 21 years old and I've been with my boyfriend for 6 months... but we met 2 1/2 years ago (I was forced to move away) and sparks flew so much so that he came 3000 miles just to find out if we were meant to be 2 1/2 years later. He is 19 and I understand that he still checks out the ladies and I don't care that he looks. I used to be bisexual and he wants to have a threesome now but I've grown up a bit and I don't think that it would be good for our relationship but he doesn't want to accept that. What should I do? I know he loves me and he's not intending to hurt me... He's just being brutally honest as always. How do I make him see how that makes me feel even though I understand his need for experimentation? Since he is brutally honest, that is an invitation for you to
match. Tell him honestly exactly how you feel about doing that,
be true and authentic to yourself, don't just try to please him,
and, if he really wants to do a threesome, tell him he is absolutely
free to go find two other ladies to do it with, and be brutally
honest with him about the probable consequences as to how you will
feel if he does. I have yet to hear about a threesome that was not
eventually a relationship-breaker, by the way. You probably already
understand that. He doesn't. And possibly he needs to grow a whole
lot more before he is truly ready for an authentic and congruent
commitment. You might just be wise to cut him lose and tell him
to come find you at some later time when he has sown sufficient
oats to know the reality you already grasp. You do want an equal,
right? Sparks are great for awhile but they don't serve as a foundation
for longterm happiness.
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