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This website was created by John Grey, Ph.D., with the intention of giving you with new insights and tools to support you to be happy in love. For over 25 years, John has
provided effective and practical coaching to help people succeed
in having healthy, joyful, rewarding relationships. He offers a uniquely
powerful and intensive couples retreat to transform a relationship onto a solid path of positive growth.
Background
John Grey, Ph.D. is a relationship coach, workshop leader, and author. He received
a Doctorate in Psychology in 1975 from Stanford University, where he taught
psychology and codirected a National Science Foundation sponsored research
center. His research papers in psychobiology have been published in
major scientific and professional journals, and are widely quoted in college textbooks. He has extensive training
in cognitive and behavioral psychology, aimed at short term, goal-directed coaching to achieve specific practical results. For over a decade, he studied the psychology of personality structure with Helen Palmer (author of The Enneagram in Love and Work), focusing on how to resolve relationship distress caused by differences in personality styles. John has specialized training in somatic psychology, trauma resolution, and Somatic Experiencing, the work of Peter Levine (author of Waking the Tiger). Using training in brain science and attachment theory, John offers tools to help adults overcome reactive patterns and form a secure, happy, intimate bond. He has extensive training in Emotionally Focused Therapy, or EFT, the work of Sue Johnson (author of Hold Me Tight), and in a Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy, the work of Stan Tatkin (author of Wired for Love).
John has been in private practice in the San Francisco Bay Area since 1980. Over the past three decades, he has also presented workshops in communication techniques and relationship skills at places like the Esalen Institute in Big Sur, the University of California Berkeley, Stanford University, the Scripps Institute in La Jolla, and at venues throughout the Bay Area. He has given numerous professional training programs for counselors, therapists, coaches, and other helping professionals on how to effectively help clients improve their relationships and achieve personal growth. He was on Dr. John Gray's (author of the bestselling Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus) referral list of couples counselors, and he worked with John Grinder, teacher of Tony Robbins and the developer of Neurolinguistic Programming, or NLP. Additionally, John has authored multiple relationship self-help books and created an interactive relationship self-help system, which can be explored on this website. He is currently writing a new book that integrates neurobiology and attachment theory in a way that helps couples engage in practices to build secure partnership and share in authentic, fulfilling intimacy.
Read more details about John's background...
Approach to Working with Couples
John works in a highly supportive way, respecting and responding to each person's individual needs. This enables couples to make rapid progress in achieving their goals. Each of us is different, and each couple is different. Working with you is customized to match your specific needs and your particular styles — so you can get deep, personally meaningful help.
Over a 25-year span of helping couples, John has mastered a broad repertoire of coaching and counseling techniques, which allows him to flexibly address your specific wants and needs. He has learned how to understand and effectively work with very different personality types — and to appreciate how each couple is a unique combination of two personal styles.
John has trained therapists in effective communication and change techniques that address the needs of each individual, including NeuroLinguistic Programming (NLP). As a workshop leader, he has presented relationship skills programs at the University of California, Stanford University, Scripps Medical Center and the Esalen Institute in Big Sur.
Being a former Stanford research psychologist, he keeps abreast of and integrates current studies on relationship
satisfaction into his work with couples. He also follows the latest research in brain science, neurobiology, and attachment styles — fields that have enormous relevance in understanding emotion and in knowing the true underlying factors in relationship dynamics and what causes success or failure.
And, John has authored several relationship
books, including an interactive self-help system. Please explore these materials on this website.
John has a reputation for his versatility,
skill and effectiveness. In working with him, you know that you are
getting effective coaching. He is often sought out by psychologists and other helping professionals, who come to him for help in their personal relationships.
John's unique approach, combined with a broad experience and background, gives you a powerful opportunity to make a
fundamental breakthrough in your relationship. Here are a few distinguishing aspects of his style of work.
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Get Tools, Not Just Talk —
Couples wanting a change don't need therapy. They need an education
and new tools. Come and learn a powerful assortment of tools to make positive changes. Get results-oriented, versatile, effective coaching.
And take home new tools to stay on a positive track. |
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A Different Approach —
Having trained hundreds of therapists in advanced communication tools, John knows how normal therapy is often ineffective in helping couples. The retreat offers you a major qualitative difference in ways to resolve issues in a productive way. The range and effectiveness of the tools you will get is vastly broader than the standard counseling fare. |
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Practical Results, Not Just Theory — Before becoming a relationship coach, John was a research psychologist at Stanford University.
He knows the difference between practical results vs. someone's personal theory. What you get is validated by current scientific findings in psychology and neurobiology. |
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Reviews
by Experts
Comments on the relationship tools John has
created and on the coaching he gives to couples:
"Powerful tools
to expand joy and happiness. Discover new options that will make
a
positive difference in your relationship."
— John Gray, Ph.D., Author of Men Are from Mars,
Women Are from Venus
"John is a phenomenal couples coach, among the best I've encountered. He offers state-of-the-art tools and understandings to couples in distress. He knows how to help couples move their relationship onto a solid foundation, into a real intimate partnership."
— Susan Campbell, Ph.D., Couples Therapist, Author of Getting Real and The Couples Journey
"A thoughtful,
inspiring guidebook for the qualities and stages necessary for fulfilling,
growth-filled relationships."
— Angeles Arrien, Ph.D., Author of The Four Fold
Way
"A friendly
source of guidance and wisdom, to help you have the kind of relationship
you truly want."
— John Welwood, Ph.D., Couples Therapist, Author of Journey of the Heart and Love and Awakening
"John offers a powerful combination of healing wisdom and compassion to guide a couple in crisis to a secure and sustainable rebirth in their relationship. He will safely hold both of you, through even your deepest pain or fears, so that you can trust your self to open your hearts to each other in ways you didn't even know exist within and between you."
— Carista Luminare, Ph.D., Counselor and Leadership Consultant
"John is a superbly skilled, wise and authentic relationship coach, and the framework he uses is magnificently suited to genuine transformation. "
— Deborah Boyar, Ph.D., Therapist and Workshop Leader |
